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1 Reason You Keep Attracting Chaos

Mark Travers, Ph.D.

By Mark Travers, Ph.D.

October 27, 2025

Mark Travers, Ph.D., is the lead psychologist at Awake Therapy, responsible for new client intake and placement. Mark received his B.A. in psychology, magna cum laude, from Cornell University and his M.A. and Ph.D. from the University of Colorado Boulder. His academic research has been published in leading psychology journals and has been featured in The New York Times and The New Yorker, among other popular publications. He is a regular contributor for Forbes and Psychology Today, where he writes about psycho-educational topics such as happiness, relationships, personality, and life meaning.

Your brain’s reward system may be the real reason you repeat the same bad choices. Here’s how to outsmart it.

Have you ever felt a strong pull to do something reckless, say, splurge on an expensive item you don’t need, flirt with someone you shouldn’t or even take physical risks just for the thrill? It might seem irrational or even self-sabotaging, but you might still go for it, only to later wonder why you made that choice in the first place.

If you relate to this, then know that you are not alone. Surprisingly, these impulses often stem from a powerful yet overlooked emotion, which is boredom.

Boredom isn’t just a dull or fleeting feeling. It’s usually a signal from your brain that your current experiences aren’t stimulating enough, which can nudge you to seek something new; anything to break the monotony.

For many, that “something new” doesn’t always have to be pleasant or safe. This way, boredom can push many people toward experiences that are risky, or even slightly negative, just because they are different from the emotional state they might find themselves stuck in. This is backed by 2019 research published in Emotion.

Researchers explored how boredom influences the choices people make across several studies. Participants were first made to feel bored through neutral or repetitive tasks. Then, they were given opportunities to select new experiences. Some experiences were pleasant, some neutral and some were unpleasant.

Interestingly, researchers found that those who reported feeling more bored were significantly more likely to pick the unpleasant experiences. It wasn’t so much that they wanted to feel bad. The point was that anything, even discomfort, felt more stimulating than the dullness they were trapped in.

In the second study, boredom was deliberately manipulated. Some participants were placed in a low-boredom condition, while others were made to feel high levels of boredom.

Those in the high-boredom condition reported a stronger desire for novelty. That craving for newness made them more likely to choose novel but negative experiences over safe and familiar ones. Essentially, the need to feel something different overpowered the need to feel good.

The third study added another twist. Participants were made bored using either positive or negative stimuli. Say, watching something cheerful that became repetitive or something unpleasant that lost its intensity.

The results revealed that boredom pushes people to seek contrast. Those who grew bored from positive experiences were more likely to choose something negative next, while those bored by negative experiences sought something positive. What mattered wasn’t the emotional valence (good or bad) but the idea of wanting a sense of something different.

These findings reveal something very important. Boredom is an active emotional state that drives you to explore and escape “the usual.”

When Boredom Works In Your Favor

While boredom can often lead you into impulsive or even self-defeating choices, it isn’t always a bad thing. In fact, boredom can serve an important psychological purpose. It can help you gain awareness that something in your life lacks meaning, variety or challenge. And when approached consciously, this discomfort can help spark creativity and personal growth in many ways.

A 2022 study published in the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health explored how boredom affects a person’s sense of meaning in life.

Researchers followed over 700 participants over three months. They first measured their levels of boredom. Three months later, the same participants completed assessments measuring their cognitive flexibility, which is the ability to adapt one’s thinking, along with their social support and sense of meaning in life.

The findings were quite interesting. Boredom itself was linked to a lower sense of meaning. However, this relationship depended on how flexible and adaptive people were in their thinking. Those who could reframe situations and shift perspectives were better able to turn boredom into a cue for self-reflection and change. Ultimately, they experienced a stronger sense of meaning in life.

In contrast, people with lower cognitive flexibility tended to feel stuck. This way, boredom amplifies feelings of emptiness or lack of direction.

So, boredom in itself isn’t what drains life of meaning. What helps decide the impact of boredom is how you respond to it. When your mind feels stuck and boredom strikes in a persistent way, it is often a subtle but powerful sign that something within you is ready for change.

Those who can shift perspectives to reinterpret their circumstances or find small ways to create novelty tend to use boredom as a springboard rather than a sinkhole.

Turning Restlessness Into Renewal

Your boredom might nudge you toward stirring things up, such as starting unnecessary drama, rekindling old situations or chasing thrills for thrill’s sake. In these moments, you’re likely after a sense of feeling alive, having something to look forward to or feeling a sense of momentum, even if that moment may not truly be moving you forward. The mind craves stimulation so badly that it sometimes mistakes chaos for change.

The key is to bring awareness to that impulse. Recognize that while these bursts may momentarily ease the emptiness, they rarely help you create lasting fulfillment. Real as well as lasting change begins when you can sit with that restlessness long enough to choose direction over distraction.

The very same boredom can become a strong ground for clarity and creativity. It gives you the space needed to pause and let your mind wander, which can be so helpful. It gives you the chance to connect dots you wouldn’t otherwise see in constant stimulation.

What many mistake for stagnation is often the “incubation period;” a quiet period where your mind is processing and reorganizing as well as preparing for new insights.

A 2025 study on creative writing found that participants who let their minds wander during short breaks, rather than actively thinking about the task, were found to show greater improvements in creativity when returning to the same story.

So, while your mind might want to drift to something engaging to kill off the boredom, know that it can actually enhance problem-solving and innovation. You then allow yourself to return to challenges with fresh ideas and new perspectives.

When you embrace meaningless time or boredom, rather than trying to run from it, you open the door to seeing things differently, often even learning how to approach life and problems in new ways while also strengthening your ability to adapt and think creatively in everyday life.

In doing so, you learn how to bring novelty into your life in a more intentional way, rather than the kind that comes from chaos or impulse. Instead of seeking excitement in temporary highs, you begin to create it through curiosity and meaningful change. This form of novelty helps you evolve every single day and makes your life more expansive.

Ultimately, boredom can help reshape how you live and find joy in the everyday if you change the way you respond to it.

Is your boredom driving you to chase unnecessary drama? Take this science-backed test to find out: Need For Drama Scale

A similar version of this article can also be found on Forbes, here.