Is Cannabis A Quick Fix To A Dead Bedroom?
Some sexperts claim cannabis can do wonders for a stagnant sex life, but what does psychological science say about using THC and CBD to enhance intimacy?
By Jourdan Travers, LCSW | June 14, 2023
Many individuals and couples who come to therapy struggling with a dead bedroom at home wonder if cannabis is the cure to their sex-life slump. They may say things like:
- "We've read about the positive effects of cannabis on sexual pleasure, and we're considering exploring it as a solution to our lack of sexual intimacy. How can we do this safely?"
- "My partner claims to experience more heightened orgasms after using marijuana, but I am apprehensive about what its negative effects might be."
- "The last time we remember having great sex was months ago, under the influence of marijuana. Are there any drawbacks to using marijuana to improve our sex life that we should know about?"
It's no secret that cannabis can enhance sexual pleasure for some people. A 2019 study published in Sexual Medicine found that women who used marijuana prior to sex were over two times as likely to report satisfactory orgasms compared to women who did not. The pleasure-enhancing properties of cannabis were also found to exist in men, with another 2019 study published in the same journal reporting that men who used cannabis more often had better scores on various aspects of sexual function including how satisfied they were with orgasms, erections, and sex in general.
If you find yourself in a sexual rut, it's important to realize that it is usually influenced by a variety of factors. There's no instant remedy; instead, it's necessary to address the underlying issues. These issues can be related to stress, mental health conditions such as depression and anxiety, or, in some cases, sexual incompatibility.
There are some leading sex therapists and intimacy specialists, however, who point to cannabis as a potential means to address these core issues and reignite passions in the bedroom.
Holly Robinson, an intimacy therapist, believes that THC and CBD, which are the two major cannabinoids found in cannabis, may have a role to play in creating a stress-free, relaxing atmosphere in the bedroom, which can translate to enhanced sex.
"Both THC and CBD mitigate unhelpful thoughts (like work-related stress) by creating a tunnel vision of what simply feels nice on your skin in the moment, rather than worrying about chasing an unachievable orgasm," she explains. "If ego and insecurities are hindering your sex life, using cannabis can result in more intimate, vulnerable, and enjoyable sex, as it can help suppress intrusive thoughts."
Bat Sheva Marcus, a sex therapist, also believes that THC can help women who struggle with a lower sex drive.
"I've had a significant number of women report feeling more aroused with the use of THC, as well as achieving intense orgasms much easier and generally 'feeling sexier' day to day," she explains.
That said, here are two things to keep in mind about the psychological and relational impact of using marijuana to improve your sex life.
#1. Be on the same page with your partner about cannabis
A 2016 study published in Psychology of Addictive Behaviors found that there is a complex relationship between marijuana use and relationship dynamics. The study discovered that the alignment of marijuana use patterns between partners may play a role in shaping relationship quality, with couples who used (or abstained) together displaying better adaptation to conflicts in the relationship when compared to couples where only one partner used. The research found that couples in which the female partner used marijuana while the male partner abstained were particularly prone to relationship discord.
A newer study published in Cannabis also found that couples that used cannabis together reported higher intimacy. However, these positive effects on intimacy vanished when one partner used marijuana independently, without the presence or involvement of the other partner.
So, before taking the plunge and exploring the world of cannabis-enhanced sex, ask yourselves the following questions:
- Are both of you equally enthusiastic about the idea of bringing marijuana into the bedroom?
- Do either of you have underlying mental health conditions (such as anxiety) that tend to worsen with marijuana use?
- Is cannabis legal where you live?
#2. Cannabis use can sometimes cause issues in your relationship
A 2015 study published in Drug and Alcohol Dependence found that individuals who used marijuana were at a higher risk for impulsive and hostile behavior on the day of use. Understand how you and your partner react to cannabis, and proceed with caution.
At the end of the day, cannabis, though legal, is a recreational drug that changes how we perceive and respond to the world around us, often in ways we don't fully understand. Be mindful of any negative effects that may arise, and never use it as a crutch in your relationship. Intimacy specialists like Robinson agree:
"It's important to use cannabis mindfully and responsibly. It shouldn't become a crutch, as anything you can achieve through use is achievable through self-development and inner work."
To avoid fighting a problem with an even bigger problem, try to recognize and work through any relationship issues that may be causing a slump in your sex life before attempting to use marijuana to enhance intimacy. This decreases the likelihood of couples developing an unhealthy reliance on cannabis to 'manufacture' intimacy, while still reaping the sexual benefits of THC and CBD.
Conclusion
Cannabis can jumpstart sexual intimacy in partners who are experiencing a dead bedroom, but it is not a magical cure to all your sexual problems, many of which may have their roots outside the bedroom. Try to work on these core issues with your partner, and use cannabis safely and responsibility to enhance, not synthesize, intimacy.