What Makes Dating Apps So Alluring To Cheaters?
Research shows that there are two major reasons that dating apps are a go-to for practicing infidelity.
By Mark Travers, Ph.D. | April 11, 2024
With the cloak of online anonymity, dating apps have become a popular means to an adulterous end. A 2020 study found that 40% of American participants used dating apps while being in serious relationships.
In fact, a study published in the journal Personality and Individual Differences revealed that many users swiped on Tinder while in a relationship and knew others who did the same.
Some committed individuals cheat when they experience relationship dissatisfaction or a hunger for novelty and excitement. Others seek short-term encounters to satisfy their curiosity and understand their value as potential dating partners. Whatever the reason, it is clear that infidelity is rife in committed relationships—and dating apps are a springboard for such encounters.
Here are two factors that drive committed individuals to cheat on dating apps.
1. Inflated Perceptions Of Desirability
Coupled individuals' commitment and behavior tends to be influenced by their perception of self and their partner. Constant exposure to alternative partners can fuel doubts about "mate value"—how valuable a person is as a partner in a romantic relationship.
This creates a perceived difference between one's own mate value in comparison to their partner's. This discrepancy can affect relationship satisfaction, prompting individuals to commit infidelity.
A 2023 study published in Current Psychology found that committed individuals with higher self-perceived mate value are more likely to engage in online infidelity. Specifically, individuals who believe they have more successful dating app experiences perceive their mate value to be higher than their partner's.
A higher number of matches inflate an individual's perception of their desirability, making them more likely to seek out alternative romantic and sexual opportunities.
2. 'Dark' Personality Influences
Personality seems to influence the motives and behaviors of coupled individuals using dating apps. A study published in Computers in Human Behavior concluded that committed individuals using Tinder display certain socially undesirable personality traits in comparison to single users and committed non-users, including:
- Neuroticism, conscientiousness and agreeableness. Committed individuals with higher levels of neuroticism and lower levels of conscientiousness and agreeableness are driven to use Tinder for casual sexual encounters. Dating apps also serve to alleviate romantic insecurities and provide validation to neurotic individuals.
- Extraversion and openness to experience. Committed individuals with higher levels of extraversion and openness to experience use Tinder more than their counterparts, seeking opportunities to meet new people. They pursue potential flings with other users offline and have more romantic encounters in real life.
- Psychopathy. Committed individuals using Tinder have higher levels of psychopathy and seek short-term partners to have more sexual experiences. They use dating apps to satisfy their self-interest and indulge in one-night stands.
- Machiavellianism and narcissism. Committed individuals with higher levels of machiavellianism and narcissism use Tinder to boost their egos. They employ the app to self-promote, gain others' approval and boost their sense of importance.
In the online dating sphere, personality differences shape the trajectories of infidelity, leading committed partners to explore options outside of their relationship.
In a world teeming with easy alternatives and access, one can do everything right in a relationship and still find themselves on the receiving end of infidelity. This type of betrayal can leave deep emotional scars, but it's important to remember that healing is possible. If your partner has indulged in infidelity, it's essential that you process this burden at your pace, without assigning self-blame or pressuring yourself to move on before you are ready.
Wondering if your Tinder usage is unhealthy? Take this test to find out: Problematic Tinder Use Scale
A similar version of this article can also be found on Forbes.com, here.