2 Ways To Cultivate Long-Lasting 'Happiness Horizons'
Good moods don't have to end. Here's how to make them last as long as you'd like them to.
By Mark Travers, Ph.D. | February 16, 2024
Do you ever find yourself basking in the warmth of a joyous moment, only to be haunted by a voice in your head going, "When will my good mood end?" The transitory nature of happiness is a common experience we all share.
This what-goes-up-must-come-down logic isn't flawed. For instance, a 2020 study found that while receiving a promotion may increase your well-being and happiness for up to three months, it has little to no impact thereafter. But what if this is because you are missing the larger picture? Could you consciously use your promotion to craft a chain-reaction of happy events to come? That's what widening your "happiness horizon" is all about.
Here are two ways to stretch a happy moment and make it last, according to science.
1. Share These Moments With People Who Truly Have Your Back
A 2022 study published in Personality and Individual Differences suggests that self-compassion has an under-discussed benefit—it helps us savor and bask in the glory of victories.
According to lead author Benjamin Schellenberg, "People who tend to be self-compassionate may have a better ability to be mindful and present during good times and recognize that they deserve to experience positive experiences to their fullest."
This quality can be cultivated by surrounding yourself with people who set a precedent for how we treat ourselves. When we're surrounded by individuals who show us kindness, understanding and support, it becomes easier to internalize these qualities and practice self-compassion.
Sometimes, we tend to focus disproportionately on the fair-weather friends around us when we celebrate an achievement. What follows is a looming sense of hollowness, knowing that these individuals, "fun" or "cool" as they may be, will not stick around when we need help or support during our lowest moments. Rather than chase a short-term boost in your happiness levels by sharing it with opportunistic individuals, try to figure out who your real friends are in your moments of joy.
Celebrating your successes and happy moments with those who have supported you through tough times can remind you that no matter what happens after this, you have a support system that will care for you and help you power through the obstacles in your path. This can improve overall well-being, which is key to widening your happiness horizon.
2. Engage In "Positive Activity Scheduling"
Happiness can sometimes be blinding, but sometimes blind positivity is exactly what we need to sustain a joyous life. When you are feeling particularly happy, it might be a good idea to practice "activity scheduling."
Though activity scheduling is a method for treating depression (via cognitive behavioral therapy), it can be used to maximize your happiness even if you aren't depressed.
For example, let's say you've just received some fantastic news at work and are riding a wave of happiness. You decide to harness this positive energy by planning a series of activities that amplify your joy:
- You start by scheduling a weekend hike with friends, knowing that nature always elevates your mood.
- You also block out time for your favorite yoga class, which you find both relaxing and invigorating.
- You then plan an evening dedicated to your hobby of painting, which you often neglect due to your busy schedule. You understand that engaging in creative activities not only boosts your current happiness but also provides a sense of fulfillment.
- With your newfound sense of accomplishment and well-being, you find the confidence to go out on a date later in the week.
- Additionally, you set new, achievable goals for yourself at work, which keep you motivated and excited for your future growth.
This way, you are able to not just experience one great mood, but have it snowball into several wonderful experiences, each of which can elevate your well-being in their own unique and powerful way.
Broadening your happiness horizon is about recognizing the transient nature of joy and taking proactive steps to extend it. It's important to share our successes and failures with the right kind of people—they can help us realize that even if happiness is fleeting, we can always get it back. This resilience can also help us plan ahead strategically, foreseeing that happiness doesn't last forever. These strategies, grounded in psychological science, offer a practical approach to cultivating a life that's not just happy on occasion, but richly and deeply fulfilling in the long run.
A similar version of this article can also be found on Forbes.com, here.