
Relationship Sabotage Scale
Are you the problem in your relationship? Take this test to find out.
By Mark Travers, Ph.D.
August 12, 2024

By Mark Travers, Ph.D.
August 12, 2024
Mark Travers, Ph.D., is the lead psychologist at Awake Therapy, responsible for new client intake and placement. Mark received his B.A. in psychology, magna cum laude, from Cornell University and his M.A. and Ph.D. from the University of Colorado Boulder. His academic research has been published in leading psychology journals and has been featured in The New York Times and The New Yorker, among other popular publications. He is a regular contributor for Forbes and Psychology Today, where he writes about psycho-educational topics such as happiness, relationships, personality, and life meaning. Click here to schedule an initial consultation with Mark or another member of the Awake Therapy team. Or, you can drop him a note here.
Relationship sabotage refers to self-defeating behaviors that individuals engage in—often due to deep-seated fears or insecurities—which ultimately undermine their romantic relationships. These behaviors can include defensiveness, trust issues, avoidance of intimacy and negative communication patterns. Often, people who engage in relationship sabotage do so as a way to protect themselves from potential hurt or rejection, but these actions ironically lead to the very outcomes they fear.
The root causes of relationship sabotage often stem from insecure attachment styles, past traumas or low self-esteem. Individuals with these issues might fear abandonment or feel unworthy of love, leading them to push their partner away or create unnecessary conflict. This behavior can have significant consequences, including decreased relationship satisfaction, increased conflict, and a higher likelihood of breakup.
The Relationship Sabotage Scale, developed by Raquel Peel and Nerina Caltabiano, measures self-defeating behaviors in romantic relationships. It focuses on three key factors: defensiveness, trust difficulty and a lack of relationship skills. The scale helps identify patterns of behavior that can undermine relationships and provides insights into areas for improvement to build healthier connections.
You can take this test here. Follow all of the steps to receive your results.
References: Peel, R., & Caltabiano, N. (2021). The Relationship Sabotage Scale: An evaluation of factor analyses and constructive validity. BMC Psychology, 9(1), 1-15. https://doi.org/10.1186/s40359-021-00644-0