4 Ways To Start Your Relationship's 'Winter Arc'

As winter draws nearer, now's the perfect time for you and your partner to do the same: embrace closeness.

By Mark Travers, Ph.D. | November 05, 2024

As the year winds down, the viral "winter arc" trend on TikTok has inspired a focus on personal wellness and growth. Initially centered around individual health and self-improvement during the last 90 days of the year, it encourages us to use this time to reflect, recharge and prepare for what's ahead. But just like individuals, relationships also benefit from intentional care and attention.

For couples, this season is a perfect opportunity to reset and refocus. The shift in seasons often brings natural introspection, and adjusting habits during this time can create a sense of emotional security, deepening your bond. Instead of waiting for the new year to work on your relationship, why not use these final months to strengthen your connection?

Here are four key elements to include in your relationship's "winter arc" survival kit.

1. Intentional Time Together

During the "winter arc," many people scale back on socializing to focus on personal growth. But for your relationship, intentionally setting aside time with your partner is key. Rather than getting stuck in the routine of binge-watching TV or mindlessly scrolling through social media, dedicate time for activities that foster real connection. Whether it's a weekly date night at a new restaurant, a cozy movie night at home with your favorite films, or cooking a meal together, these moments create opportunities for bonding and collaboration in a relaxed setting.

Making time for each other strengthens emotional bonds and builds a solid partnership that can weather the hectic holiday season. Research backs this up— a 2010 study in Psychology and Aging found that spending time with a partner significantly boosts happiness, especially when marital satisfaction is strong. This bond not only enhances day-to-day happiness but also serves as a buffer against life's challenges, showing how intentional connection is vital for well-being in long-term relationships.

2. Relationship Check-Ins

Just as you would take time to assess your personal goals during the "winter arc," it's equally important to check in on your relationship. Schedule regular check-ins—maybe bi-weekly or monthly—where you can openly discuss how things are going. Create a safe space where both of you feel comfortable sharing your feelings, celebrating what's working and identifying areas for improvement.

Keep these conversations focused on growth instead of criticism. According to the research by John and Julie Gottman, criticism, one of the "Four Horsemen" of relationships, attacks your partner's character rather than addressing specific behaviors. This kind of critique can feel like an attack on their whole being, which can deeply harm your connection.

Instead, frame your feedback positively and constructively. This approach nurtures understanding and connection, helping to build a stronger partnership as you head into the new year.

3. Wellness Goals For Two

The "winter arc" is all about prioritizing physical and mental wellness, and you can bring that focus into your relationship as well. Consider setting joint wellness goals that not only boost your physical health but also enhance your emotional well-being.

This could mean committing to working out together three times a week or taking evening walks to unwind after a long day. You might even explore mindfulness exercises, like yoga or meditation, that you can practice side-by-side.

Working towards these health goals together can be a powerful bonding experience. Supporting each other through workouts or mindfulness practices not only improves your physical health but also strengthens the sense of teamwork and encouragement in your relationship.

In fact, research published in Behaviour Therapy in 2004 found that couples who engage in wellness activities together reported significant improvements in relationship satisfaction, closeness and acceptance, along with a reduction in relationship distress. Participants also noted personal benefits, such as increased optimism and relaxation, highlighting how these shared goals can truly enhance both your individual well-being and your connection.

4. Random Acts Of Warmth

While winter often brings to mind cozy moments, it's easy to slip into mundane routines and forget to express love in small, everyday ways. To keep the warmth alive in your relationship, surprise your partner with thoughtful gestures that show you care—whether it's brewing their favorite coffee in the morning, leaving sweet notes in unexpected places or taking on a chore they usually dread. These little surprises can ignite sparks of affection and keep your connection thriving during the chilly months.

Random acts of warmth serve as powerful reminders that your partner is cherished and appreciated. A 2012 study found that individuals who feel valued by their romantic partners are more likely to reciprocate that appreciation, respond to their partner's needs and commit more fully to the relationship. This cycle of kindness creates a foundation of gratitude and affection that helps your bond remain strong and resilient over time. So, as the days get colder, let those small gestures of love keep the warmth alive.

The "winter arc" season isn't only about individual improvement. Are you ready to create a Winter Arc checklist specifically for your relationship? Take the Relationship Satisfaction Test to find out.

A similar version of this article can also be found on Forbes.com, here.