Loneliness In Intimate Relationships Scale

Take this test to understand why you feel lonely, even when around your partner.

By Mark Travers, Ph.D. | December 8, 2023

The Loneliness in Intimate Relationships Scale is a newly introduced scale designed to gauge the experience of "loneliness" within intimate relationships, which can influence one’s emotional, physical and spiritual well-being even when in close proximity to their partner.

The scale evaluates three primary factors that reflect loneliness in such relationships: feelings of detachment or emotional distance from the partner, sensations of hurt or emotional pain and elements of guilt tied to the relationship dynamics.

Given that the nuanced experience of loneliness within intimate unions has not been extensively explored in the past, the scale serves as a crucial instrument in understanding, assessing and delving deeper into the facets of this specific kind of loneliness and its implications.

You can take this test here. Please follow all of the steps to receive your results.

Step 1: Rate, on a scale of Strongly Disagree to Strongly Agree, how closely each statement aligns with your feelings or thoughts during a particular time or situation when you experienced loneliness in your relationship.

1. I felt a deep sense of pain.

2. I felt hurt.

3. I felt insulted.

4. I was very tense.

5. My husband/partner had no time for me.

6. I felt that I was not fulfilling my part in the relationship.

7. I felt guilty for my misdeeds in the marriage/relationships.

8. I invested in the relationship without getting back.

9. I felt that I was not worthy of their love.

10. I felt that I was not important to them.

11. I felt that I could not continue like this.

12. I wondered whether we are compatible.

13. I contemplated a breakup/divorce.

14. I thought that I was infantile.

Step 2: Enter your age, gender, region, and first name so we can provide you with a detailed report that compares your test scores to people similar to you.

What is your age?

What is your gender?

What region of the world do you live in?

What is your first name?

Step 3: Check to make sure you've provided answers to all of the statements/questions above. Once you've done that, click the button below to send your responses to Awake Therapy's Lead Psychologist, Mark Travers, Ph.D. He will provide you with an overview of how you scored relative to others (all answers are anonymized and confidential to protect users' privacy). He can also answer any follow-up questions you may have.

References: Rokach A, Sha'ked A, Ben-Artzi E. Loneliness in Intimate Relationships Scale (LIRS): Development and Validation. Int J Environ Res Public Health. 2022 Oct 10;19(19):12970. doi: 10.3390/ijerph191912970. PMID: 36232275; PMCID: PMC9565016.